Saturday, 24 December 2016

Touch me special December 2016 Edition. Theme: Home MInistries. Sexual and financial management; the souce of home happiness



Topic: Sexual and financial management:  The source of home happiness
Textual Source: Genesis 38:8-10; 11:29; 1Tim.5:8
·         Happiness define: a state of well-being and contentment. a pleasurable or satisfying experience
·         Happiness in relation with sex: causing pleasure: causing or characterized by pleasure, contentment, or joy.
·         Happiness in relation to finance:  fortunate: resulting unexpectedly in something pleasant or welcome.
a.       Home without sexual satisfaction
This kind of situation have been seen as one of the major causes of divorce and separation in marriage. A marriage is expected to be sexually satisfactory to both party. No one is expected to be unsatisfactory sexually. Every home with unsatisfactory sexual relationship tends to hit rock. 1Cor.7:4-5. Sexual intercourse is the major food of marriage after love. As food is for the mouth so also sex is the answer for sexual urge in marriage. Many relationships that breaks break majorly because there was not an active sexual relationship. Either of the party is unsatisfactory. When sex becomes casual in marriage, the two parties involve becomes casual lover. Every casual lover shares their love with more than one partner. Remember, bed must be undefiled. Heb.13:4. Marriage with unsatisfactory love and sexual relation shares bed with other partner and bed becomes defiled. Anger, grief and misunderstand are among what do characterize home with unsatisfactory sexual relation. Collaboration, cordial relation and helping hand seems not to be part of what could be visible in this kind of relationship. Marriage is said to be enjoy not endure but for a home with unsatisfactory sexual relation, they tend to endure marriage. The reason why they endure marriage is because they failed to follow biblical precepts for marriage in the word of God. Most people will not even look at the side of the Bible (the word of God) before calling it quit in their relationship. The irony part of this problem is that whenever there is dispute in a marriage, if it were caused by unsatisfactory sexual relationship, both parties would not like to wash their dirty linen in the presence of the panel that came to settle the dispute. Only few would be bold enough to mention it. If you want to make your home a haven of peace, let there be satisfactory sexual relationship. Every home that ignore active sexual relationship, both partner will be cheating on one another and finally the home will surely break.
b.       Causes of unsatisfactory sexual relationship
1.       dirtiness
2.       pain
3.       unsettled dispute
4.       sickness
5.       unsettled heart
6.       unholy relationship outside the wedlock
7.       holier than thou attitude
8.       unhealed broken heart
9.       financial incapability
10.    engagement in hard labour
11.    when you make your day full of different activities
c.        Dangers of unsatisfactory sexual relation in a home
1.       Bed defilement
2.       Adultery
3.       Divorcement
4.       Separation
5.       Lack of trust
6.       Uncontrollable anger
7.       Hatred
8.       Financial incapability
9.       abandonment
10.    Misunderstanding
11.    Showing lack of interest to virtually everything at home
d.       Sex and timing: The timing for sex depends on how both parties programs their bed hour. There is no specific time for sex in marriage, contrary to some who opined that sex can only be done at night when light is off or when it’s dark. There is no shyness as marriage is concerned. Both parties were not expected to be ashamed of one another. Whenever sexual urge arouses, the other party needs not delay before responding.
e.       Understanding financial statutes of the family
The two parties involve in the marriage should have a perfect knowledge of the home financial statutes. Home finance is not what someone should alone preside on always. The knowledge of financial statutes should be well understood to both parties. When both parties have a perfect knowledge of financial situation of the family, this would curb extravagant spending. There should be no reason why the wife or the husband would have secrecy regarding to what he/she earns. There should not be monopoly of cash dispense. Most husband believed they should be the only one with right to spend money without been cautioned. This is on the contrary, it’s not acceptable in any way. There should be no secret account or secret project. Both parties must have knowledge of what is going on financially in the family. This would help to map out a good standard of living for the entire family if both parties participate financially in the affairs of the Home. A Christian family is expected to be financial transparent one to another.
f.        Income and expenditure in home finance
There is no reason why we should spend more than our income. Whenever this happens, it leads to bankruptcy. Starting from the day of wedding which was the day marriage begun. Some started their marriage on debt. They overdo things and spend more than they should. No one spend more than his income that will not go into debt. Proper plan is expected financially in every Christian home. It is an act of giving oneself to be punished by the Devil when you are spending more than what you earn. You should be ready to live within your income. Flashy materials should not always be pursuing unless if need be. In the making of a wealthy family, there should be a strict control on finance. This would help greatly in a way to quickly actualize your dream.
g.       Sex and finance: Two ways of weakening and strengthening home relationship
Sex and finance are two weapons by which a home could be strengthening and weakening. Whenever Devil wants to weaken and wreak a home, he makes sex and financial life of that family unbearable. We must be open minded to one another. Wife should not starve her husband neither the husband in regard of sex. Sex is another way of communicating to your spouse that you really care for him/her. When your spouse is urged sexually and he/she is not satisfied. (The Bible called it inward burning.) 1Cor.7:8. That means you put the soul of your spouse on fire. A satisfactory sexual life is the only remedy for this. This is not a matter of prayer and fast. I will advise everyone to fulfil his/her part sexually and financially. Strengthening your home, strengthening your relationship, active sex and financial transparency is the answer not fasting and prayer.
Most time we fail to fulfil what we are to do in accordance to the word of God, instead we would be making God to come and act on what we are supposed to do. When a woman fails to participate in bed with her husband, by the time man becomes devil’s workshop in the hands of the daughters of Jezebel, what is the blame of God?
Conclusion: Those who starve their partner with sex have sown wind and they shall inherit emptiness. Prv.11:29. Open your hands to your partner, do not hide anything for your spouse. Active sexual intercourse makes both party to avoid fornication. 1Cor.7:2.
You are blessed in Jesus name. Amen.

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